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Working on Your Relationship - By Yourself
By Dr. Denise Fleurant, PsyD, MFT
You can create a successful relationship- even if you must do it alone!
MFT Conflicts can be expected to arise in even the strongest of relationships. Two people who attempt to create a relationship always bring their own issues, backgrounds, expectations, personalities, and inner difficulties into the interplay that occurs between them. It is not at all unusual that the two people might find themselves, at times, in a deadlock. They see no way to break the impasse and to recapture the spirit of good will that they once had and would like to have again. Each party's personal conflicts come into play and stifle the communication, sharing, and love that seem necessary for harmonious interaction. Rather than confronting our own partner in the problem, we may resort to blaming our partner.
Working alone on a relationship problem can mean that we have to take a look at our own issues and our contribution to the difficulties with our partner. While this challenge is not always easy, the pay off in terms of our own emotional wellness can be enormous, both for our own future personal happiness and for the success of our relationship. Working by ourselves on a relationship may mean coming to terms with our own issues, taking responsibility for our own happiness, breaking out of our old ways of seeing the world, changing our expectations, and accepting the good in our relationship as being enough. Rather than condemning our partner for his or her inability to work on the relationship, it is far more productive to show respect for our partner's view and to take matters for bettering the relationship in our own hands. There is a great deal that one partner, acting alone, can do to create a relationship which is happier and more fulfilling for both parties.
Working alone on your relationship means working on yourself. By making a shift in how you define your own sense of self, thoughts, and feelings, you can help create the conditions which bring your relationship into a state of mutual harmony, support, and love. A trained professional therapist can help you identify and modify patterns in the way you approach your relationship. The rewards can be immeasurable - for both you and your partner.
Dr. Denise Fleurant, PsyD, MFT
Dr. Denise A. Fleurant, PsyD, MFT is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist working as a private practitioner in the Newport area. Dr. Fleurant holds an M.A. in Marriage and Family Therapy from Chapman University, a Doctoral degree in Clinical Psychology from American Behavioral Studies Institute in California and a Post-Doctoral degree in Clinical Psychopharmacology from the Massachusetts School of Professional Psychology.
Dr. Fleurant is a member of the American Association of Marriage and Family Therapists. She is a certified diplomate of Psychotherapy of the American Psychotherapy Association and Certified Relationship Specialist. Dr. Fleurant is an affiliate member of the Midwest Center for Anxiety and Depression and continually receives advanced training in integretice medicine.
Newport Psychological Services Counseling and Assessment Center has two locations:227 West Main Road in Middletown, RI 02842, and The Polo Center, 680 Aquidneck Avenue, Middletown RI 02842. The office is handicapped accessible. Regular office hours are accommodated with evening and weekend appointments as needed.
Please call (401) 864-1493 for more information or to schedule an appointment.
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