Recognizing an Unhealthy Relationship
http://www.WomensJournals.com/articles/95/1/Recognizing-an-Unhealthy-Relationship/Page1.html
Julie Lizotte
By Julie Lizotte
Published on 05/8/2007
One of the essential elements to achieving a better life is the quality of our relationships. Published research indicates that relationships can actually contribute to a person’s longevity and well being. An image of an active and happily-retired couple enjoying themselves on the golf course comes to mind. But what happens if you suspect that your relationship is not so blissful and may actually be considered unhealthy? Trust your intuition. It is probably right on target.
Recognizing an Unhealthy Relationship
One of the essential elements to achieving a better life is the quality of our relationships. Published research indicates that relationships can actually contribute to a person’s longevity and well being. An image of an active and happily-retired couple enjoying themselves on the golf course comes to mind. But what happens if you suspect that your relationship is not so blissful and may actually be considered unhealthy? Trust your intuition. It is probably right on target.
Carefully assessing your relationship is a great place to start. We often think our partner’s behavior will change – say, if they get that promotion or our financial situation improves. We sometimes will even blame ourselves for their actions and behaviors. To understand your relationship, ask yourself the following questions.
• Are you surrounded by loving and supportive relationships?
• Does your partner respect you physically, emotionally and verbally?
• Is your relationship causing you to feel stressed, exhausted and/or depressed?
• Are you always compromising your needs and wants to please your partner?
• Does your relationship have good communication and a balance of activities to suit both partners?
• Do you gravitate to a controlling partner or are you an enabler?
After answering these questions, you may be asking yourself if you are in an unhealthy relationship. Some women will stay in relationships because they do not recognize their partner’s unhealthy behavior or they don’t realize there might be another way of living outside of the unhealthy relationship. It is important to identify why we have made certain choices in our relationships and what influenced our decisions. Once you have assessed your relationship you can see what, if anything, needs to change.
Carefully assessing your relationship is a great place to start. We often think our partner’s behavior will change – say, if they get that promotion or our financial situation improves. We sometimes will even blame ourselves for their actions and behaviors. To understand your relationship, ask yourself the following questions.
• Are you surrounded by loving and supportive relationships?
• Does your partner respect you physically, emotionally and verbally?
• Is your relationship causing you to feel stressed, exhausted and/or depressed?
• Are you always compromising your needs and wants to please your partner?
• Does your relationship have good communication and a balance of activities to suit both partners?
• Do you gravitate to a controlling partner or are you an enabler?
After answering these questions, you may be asking yourself if you are in an unhealthy relationship. Some women will stay in relationships because they do not recognize their partner’s unhealthy behavior or they don’t realize there might be another way of living outside of the unhealthy relationship. It is important to identify why we have made certain choices in our relationships and what influenced our decisions. Once you have assessed your relationship you can see what, if anything, needs to change.
Recognizing an Unhealthy Relationship
Recognizing that we may be in a relationship that is not in our best interest can be a difficult process, but a necessary one if we hope to change our situation. Everyone has a right to be in a loving, safe and stable relationship. As women, we must reassure ourselves that we are worthy of giving and receiving love and having a truly healthy partnership. When you believe you are worthy of a healthy relationship, you can then care for and appreciate yourself.
The news is not all bad. Sometimes, just assessing the relationship and talking to your partner or seeking professional counseling to work through some issues can go a long way to improve the quality of the partnership. The important thing to remember is you have a choice. The choices we make can directly improve the quality of our lives and our well-being.
The South Shore Women’s Resource Center (SSWRC), located in Plymouth, wants to start a dialogue with other women to explore relationship issues. The Center is offering interactive and supportive empowerment discussion groups Tuesdays through Fridays, mornings and evenings, to explore women’s issues and relationships. The groups are free, open to the public and confidential. Discussion groups are available throughout Plymouth County. Please call the South Shore Women’s Resource Center at 888-746-2664 for more information.
Since 1978, SSWRC has been providing comprehensive programs of violence prevention and intervention services, advocacy, support and training to women and children in Plymouth County. The Women’s Center provides a supportive environment where women can empower themselves to make changes for a safe and better quality of life.
SSWRC Emergency Hotline
24 hours a day: (888) 746-2664
Office Number:
(508) 746-2664
The emergency hotline logged 1,794 calls last year from women and family members in crisis. We provide anyone needing our help with a supportive and compassionate person on the other end of the line.
The South Shore Women’s Resource Center offers counseling, court advocacy, safety planning, child and adolescent services, older women’s and battered women’s programs, hospital advocacy and emergency services and housing.
Mailing Address:
PO Box 6237
North Plymouth, MA 02362
The news is not all bad. Sometimes, just assessing the relationship and talking to your partner or seeking professional counseling to work through some issues can go a long way to improve the quality of the partnership. The important thing to remember is you have a choice. The choices we make can directly improve the quality of our lives and our well-being.
The South Shore Women’s Resource Center (SSWRC), located in Plymouth, wants to start a dialogue with other women to explore relationship issues. The Center is offering interactive and supportive empowerment discussion groups Tuesdays through Fridays, mornings and evenings, to explore women’s issues and relationships. The groups are free, open to the public and confidential. Discussion groups are available throughout Plymouth County. Please call the South Shore Women’s Resource Center at 888-746-2664 for more information.
Since 1978, SSWRC has been providing comprehensive programs of violence prevention and intervention services, advocacy, support and training to women and children in Plymouth County. The Women’s Center provides a supportive environment where women can empower themselves to make changes for a safe and better quality of life.
SSWRC Emergency Hotline
24 hours a day: (888) 746-2664
Office Number:
(508) 746-2664
The emergency hotline logged 1,794 calls last year from women and family members in crisis. We provide anyone needing our help with a supportive and compassionate person on the other end of the line.
The South Shore Women’s Resource Center offers counseling, court advocacy, safety planning, child and adolescent services, older women’s and battered women’s programs, hospital advocacy and emergency services and housing.
Mailing Address:
PO Box 6237
North Plymouth, MA 02362